Happy New Year!!

2011 Is MY Year!!

The other night I was watching a re-run of one of my favorite programs, Criminal Minds, and they are big on using quotes in the beginning of the program and at the end. Well, at the end the quote was this:: "There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are messengers of overwhelming grief...and unspeakable love." --Washington Irving

When I heard this I was over come by tears, of course, because I began thinking of the long, difficult, often emotionally and spiritually depressing year I have endured in 2010. It was my wake up call year, I think. I believe that God gets our attention through tears and the personal challenges that often accompany them--this makes me reach for His help more. But, 2010 was a year where I had to will myself to get up and move. I had to will myself to stop all the crying and get up and begin to change my attitude from one of grief and sorrow to one of hope and unspeakable love. It was the year when I learned about unconditional love and total forgiveness. These are extremely powerful life lessons and they came hard, but now that I am on the back side of this sorrow and this learning process, I am blessed beyond my ability to express it in writing. I have learned some life lessons which have been invaluable and that have increased my love for everyone around me but especially my husband.

I have learned what true unconditional love feels like, looks like in a long term marriage. My husband and I just celebrated our 17th wedding anniversary on December 15th. At times this year I was unsure the love we had for each other would sustain the many problems we had made of our life. We goofed up in the housing market, we goofed up in our financial life, and in this process we thought we would not love each other any more because of the mistakes that we had made. We were wrong. The challenges we experienced actually had the opposite effect. We found a love for each other that was not based on mistakes or a human condition. We found that no matter what we would be true companions and love each other with no conditions attached. The way that God loves us, really, that is unconditional love. It doesn't mean you get to continue making mistakes or hurting each other, no, rather it means that through all the challenges we face in life, we do it together. We have each other's backs. We stay together no matter what. We try to not make mistakes but instead we work as a team as true partners in this marital life together. We forgive each other our mistakes and love each other more because we have the power to forgive.

We are in the midst of laying down our gorgeous birch hardwood flooring over the nasty gray light sucking concrete floors that were in our condo. My design creativity is resurfacing with a vengeance, which is making me happy to be decorating and bossing everyone around! We have already painted the walls of the entire first floor Benjamin Moore's Linen White with pearlized finish. Together these two things are making our home light up! Literally. How unbelievably appropriate that this is coming at the end of one year and the beginning of another. I will certainly be posting pictures as the process continues but right now the saw dust is everywhere! Hah!!

My point in all of this is that every single thing I have endured this year as been for a reason. It has been for my good. It is the blessing of being broken or at least feeling broken, because when God breaks something inside me that is not working anymore it is replaced by something so wonderful that I could never even have imagined it. For me, it has been understanding deep inside myself what it means to truly love and to be loved in return. It has also made me understand how powerful forgiveness is and how truly freeing it is. I have forgiven myself. I have forgiven others. And I will love with complete abandon and deal with the risks associated with being vulnerable. Because without risking giving love how will I ever really experience it? And I want ALL of what life offers me, not just pieces of it.

Under our wood floor, written onto the concrete, my husband and I have written some sentiments to each other that only the two of us know about. WE have written them so that they stay in the soul of this new home we are creating together. So that when we walk over them we are reminded of their words and their meaning. We are reminded that love and forgiveness are forever linked if two people are ever to remain and grow in love for one another. We are reminded that God loves us no matter what and that we love God no matter what. And that we love each other no matter what.

Happy New Year. God bless.

Robin

I think I see Santa!

One of my greatest regrets is not having children, however...

God has given me many different ways of mothering and that has been a miracle. I find it so ironic that the very people that have four or five kids don't really want them. They do everything BUT raise their children with character, self discipline and self respect. Then, the people who do want to have them don't have the opportunity. I have always said that God and I would do some talking when I saw him in heaven because I think I got a raw deal in this mix of life. However, there's always a reason in God's world and who am I to judge that reason. I can only cry every tear over the loss and move forward, trusting that God will provide me with other ways to mother. And boy has that come my way. I am so grateful. Mothering and having a child are two totally different things in my book.

But still the magic of Christmas is the time I have a tinge of regret. I have never heard the pitter patter of little feet coming down the stairs at the crack of dawn, spotting the Christmas cookies and milk freshly eaten and seeing their little expressions while they gaze at the many wonderfully and colorfully wrapped gifts that lay under the brightly lit tree. I think I would have loved witnessing that year after year with children. But a couple of gifts were given to me nonetheless. First, my sister had four gorgeous children and when I could get from California to Minnesota for Christmas I was able to participate in this wonderful yearly event. I recall one year when my niece, Sarah, was going through her-- I am wearing my slip ALL the time under everything phase,--running down the hallway with her slip hanging out from under her pj's, eyes wide with excitement and anticipation and ready to rip open some presents that Santa brought to her in the night. That girl was a riot and still is all these years later. My sister and her husband did such a great job in creating Christmas delight for their children and it was just fantastic to witness. They say that Christmas really is for children, but I have a slightly different take on that subject, of course.

My second gift was a little longer in coming. But, I found myself eagerly waking this morning, fresh with delight and anticipation and all we're doing is renting a Suburban and traveling to see Mitch's family in Ohio. But, every year, I wake at 4:30am ready to rumble, get the car packed, make the bed in the back of the land yacht for me, and of course, all of our animals, which consist of two 95 pound English Labrador Retrievers--one yellow and one black. And yes, even the cat comes along for the ride. We have a no cat left behind rule so she gets a small dose of kitty quaalude and off we go. I guess this is our form of Christmas delight. Our little way of expressing the joys of the Christmas season. But I do notice one thing. I am not thinking a lot about God in this little scenario and isn't this really the whole point? These Christmas rituals are fantastic but they are not the reason for the season as the bumper stickers point out.

No, the reason for the season is the birth of Jesus Christ. So it doesn't really matter much if I had children or not, if the tree was loaded with presents for the kids. Or if I have decorated the new three tree rule in the Mc Mansions these days. No, I am truly blessed by the fact that Jesus was born to save me and that is really the ultimate gift I could ever have received. Period.

Merry Christmas to all of you who are reading my silly musings. Mitch and I wish you all have joy and harmony in your home on this glorious of days:: December 25, 2010.

Merry, Merry, Christmas--Robin + Mitch

Love Joy Peace Hope Balance

This Christmas Season

I have been Christmas shopping using cash and no credit for the first time in my married life and it feels extraordinarily responsible and stressless. Mitch and celebrated 17 years of marriage on the 15th. We now say to each other we have been married 17 plus 2. What a hoot. Anyway, I would never have thought I could ever stay married to the same person for over 17 years of my life. It is one of the most rewarding things I have ever done. Period. When we were standing in the parking lot of Fleet Farm, my childhood chum and over 30 years married friend, Nancy Senne once told me to ride the waves in marriage. Some years will go by which are fantastic and some will go by that are difficult and challenging, but no matter what, you stay together and ride the waves. One of my worst mistakes is to constantly say to Mitch:: I am getting a divorce! When we argue about something. Well, one of my serious objectives for 2011 is to not say that any more. It is definitely something that I don't want to follow through on and so it is a threat I would not carry out. Hence, it is meaningless. However, it is hurtful and unnecessary. It only serves to undermine our commitment to one another and it doesn't work anymore. It also makes me feel bad when I do it to him. So, out the door it goes.

I will write more about what I foresee for the future in 2011 because I have a very, very good feeling about next year. I am getting my good mojo back and it is filling me with good vibes and a joyous heart. Even the loss of dear Steve will not hurt my positive momentum as we move into the new year. I only wish that Steve was here to move into 2011 with all of us. That loss was one that took be completely off guard and is one I will grieve for some time. He was a man with one of the kindest hearts you will ever find. I was happy to call him friend and my very first boyfriend in 6th grade. Although I think Kirk was my 5th grade boyfriend....but I digress....I will miss Steve's laugh and our bond of chronic pain issues and the struggles that accompany having that to contend with. Chronic pain moves into every facet of a persons life and it permeates every aspect of a persons daily functioning. Horrible is another way of putting it. Pain is horrible and getting it under control is what Steve was trying to accomplish. I will miss our long conversations and his positive attitude towards everything he came into contact with. He will be missed. I haven't done my rosary for him yet but I will this weekend. We have a long car ride in front of us and between knitting I will be praying for him, for my step-mother and for family and friends in general. What a great way to spend a day!!

Now, the painters will be here any minute and I am too excited for words! My home is coming together effortlessly. By the first of the new year I will have beautiful new walls that are bright and light and magnificent. Then I will have a new birch hardwood floor that will be bright and light and magnificent. Just wait! Pictures will be arriving soon and the transformation will be nothing short of spectacular. I am like a caterpillar making her way out of the cocoon. New and exciting things are here daily. I am thrilled. I will also have brand new glasses which are pink and green. Yep, you read correctly. I will now be seeing the world with rose colored glasses, well, in this case, pink colored glasses, but nonetheless, they will be perfect, positive and peppy! Rock on RockinR!! Joy comes from the heart and it is certainly in mine. PTL baby!! Hah.

More to come people and please stay in touch!

Robin

A Tragic Loss at Christmas Time

A Tribute to a Dear Grade School Friend

My first real boyfriend, besides the wonderful Kirk Bratrud in 5th grade, was Steve Friese in 6th. Although, I do believe that the entire female 6th grade class had a crush on Steve, I do count him as my first real 'boyfriend'. It may of lasted the whole of five minutes but I have very, very fond memories of what it felt liked to really like a boy.

I am a Labor Day baby and in the fall of our sixth grade year I was given my first Kodak Instamatic camera for my birthday. You know, the kind that had that silly four square light bulb dohicky on the top that served as the light source. But, even then I loved photography. Since Steve was my boyfriend we were out on the kick ball field behind Burroughs one afternoon during recess and I snapped a picture of him where I captured his spirit so completely that I saved that photograph all these years later as a way to fondly recall those wonderful days of youth. I keep telling myself I will run across the darn thing soon, but so far to no avail. I will find it though because I know I did not toss the darn thing. Anyway, it shows Steve in all his glory. In action, racing somewhere but giving the camera and me a great feisty look that spoke of his fun innerself and his powerful presence as a kind and loving soul who was at the least a fantastic football and hockey player.

We lived about one block away from each other and Steve and I actually met in 3rd grade. We then went all the way through to our first or second year of high school. I believe him telling me recently that it was at that time his father decided to become a pastor and he moved their family of mostly boys, if memory serves me, to Michigan. So, although I had lost track of him past about the 9th grade he was one I never forgot because he was unforgettable. Once you met Steve you fell in love instantly. The guys loved him because he was a real mans man and the girls loved him because he had the biggest bluest eyes you've ever seen and the best inner spirit radiated out from those eyes.

He had a fun and diverse work life raised three big strapping boys, remarried a woman he thought was incredible and was doing work currently that he truly enjoyed. We met again when three of us girls were planning our junior high school reunion from Susan B. Anthony in South Minneapolis. I did a search and found him fast. I called him and reintroduced myself as his girl friend in 6th grade. I was shocked to find out that I was only one of many, but still he was completely OVERJOYED with finding his childhood friends after a thirty year lull. In fact, he was so excited, that he asked if he could ride his Harley over to my house the day the girls and I were addressing envelops in my office. So, a few weeks later, up rides Steve on an enormous and somewhat deafening, rumbling Harley Davidson motorcycle. He pulls into my driveway and walks up to the front door. He doesn't knock he just comes in shouting his hellos from the doorway. The three of us girls are giddy with anticipation and go tearing down the stairs to see him. We intersect him at the door and there were great hugs all around. We escort him to my office and we begin to reminisce and to get current all at the same time. He tells us how much his family means to him, showing us pictures all the while. He talks of how much he thinks of his take-no-prisoners wife Kelli. He keeps telling me that the two of us HAVE to meet because we're just alike. Sadly, I never got around to having that dinner party this winter because I kept thinking I had plenty of time. Please. don't procrastinate this type of thing, as I have found out many times over --life can change on a dime.

Anyway, that day began a wonderful business relationship and friendship together that lasted up until the day he died last week from an apparent diabetic insulin overdose. Sadly, I was unable to attend his funeral or memorial because I lived so far away from him and the weather was flat out scary, but I will be doing a rosary in his honor. Kelli gave me the details of what happened and where she found him and how completely shocked she was and how shaky she is still. She had just lost her husband of 17 years (we both shared that same length of time being marriaged) so she was sick from the pain of loss. My prayers go to her and their family.

I can say without question that the greatest joy to come to him over these past many years was the reconnection of people he knew from childhood. And we were overjoyed to have reconnected with him again too. Although his body was ravaged by chronic pain and the toll that diabetes takes on ones body long term, to the end he was one of the kindest men I will ever know. His energy mirrors my husband's in many ways and I am glad they had met.

Mostly, however, I am destroyed by how quickly loss can come. I am amazed by its ability to puncture the bubble of everyday life, deflate it so quickly and then make it nearly unbearable. Kelli's loss came in an instant and so did the rest of ours. He will be forever remembered and forever missed. Kelli told me that Christmas time was his favorite time of the year. What a good time to die.

Rest peacefully, Stevie.

Your friend and childhood buddy, Robin

Self-Forgetting.

A New Me Is Emerging, Finally

I love looking at inspired architecture whether it be residential or commercial. Residential has a bit more interest simply because it is a place we would call home.

However, during all of my health issues these past two years not even an inspired residential interior could snap me out of the anger I felt towards God and everyone else for the broken body I had developed for nothing. No reason at all! Suddenly I felt myself like poor Alice, falling down a hole where there was nothing to catch hold of to stop myself from falling and no end in sight. It has been a grueling, nasty, difficult, depressing (depression to me is anger turned inward), self-pitying, rage-full, and bitter time in my life. A time when I could not catch my breath from crying. And I was mad as a hornet, in other words, not liking much of anything. When your entire body hurts and nothing seems to be getting better but seems to be worsening, things in life tend to appear a bit bleak. I know some of you can identify with me here. But, finally, through helping others in my family who are experiencing some health problems as well and watching them deal with their illness with so much positive energy, and working with a holistic therapist, I am finally snapping out of it as Cher said in that movie I can't remember the name of--drat. 'Snap out of it Robin!' I said to myself the other day. I couldn't believe it. Now, I am not saying I am cured because I uttered those words, but I understood the notion of them. I said, self, haven't you hung on to this anger and negativity for long enough? How about a little break to let God in some more. Just a little peep hole for God to shine some additional light on my broken body and help me adjust more gracefully and with more dignity to a body that is not the same anymore. Well...

Over Thanksgiving and in particular, Thanksgiving Day, it was the first time in many years I felt so completely thankful for my family. Since my stepmother's breast cancer diagnosis and subsequent mastectomy the Monday prior to Thanksgiving Day, (and now looming radiation and chemotherapy treatment), I got to witness my father share the love and devotion he feels and has for his wife by helping her during the first few days of her recovery at home. I got to think about how my husband has helped me so many times during the past many years since my spine issues have wreaked havoc on my body and daily functioning in life. And, he has done this helping of me not begrudgingly or stingily, but instead with the same love and devotion that my father reflects to his wife of over 30 years.

It was my honor to cook my parents healthful, nutritious, good food so they had something to eat when they returned from the Mayo. It was my honor to help them with their dogs while my step-mother was having her surgery and recovery days at the Mayo. It was my honor. If I could have done more for them I would have without reservation.

It is out of pure love that one does things like this in a family or with friends because self forgetting is so important and I forgot that notion entirely. Ironically, when I began to focus my attention on helping others, especially my parents in their need, I forgot about my own health issues and was able to discontinue the bulk of my pain medications and blood pressure medication entirely. Granted, I had been working towards this for a while, but I was off those meds for nearly one month until a L4/L5/S1 flare up nailed me last weekend. But, helping others helped me to forget about me. I confess, my world got mighty small when I was the only person I thought about. This reminded me about a person I knew when I lived in San Francisco who always said, 'I may not be much, but I am all I think about.' Think about that the next time you think your life is so bad because that's what I am going to do. My life isn't bad by a long shot. Period. And we in my family and that of my husband's family are truly blessed. To think otherwise would be more selfish than I could ever express here on this silly blog.

So, when Mitch and I brought up all the Thanksgiving meal fixings and forgot the gravy and the cranberry sauce it simply wasn't the end of the world as I knew it. It was something we all laughed about and a memory that was made that I will cherish for the rest of my life. My father brilliantly made cranberry sauce from his stash of dried berries by adding water and a little sugar and heating them in the microwave. They came out delicious. If I had had just a little more juice from the turkey breast I could have made gravy but since I had not cooked a breast before I didn't realize they don't contain as much fat or make as much juice, hence, nothing to help make the gravy. I know now that it was laughter and enjoyment and love that ruled that day for me. A gratitude washed over me that I hadn't felt in a long time. I am truly and fully blessed.

I also am able to witness this love in the family of my husband. My mother-in-law cares lovingly to my father-in-law due to his degenerative spine problems and she is an inspiration to me. So is he. He had some spine surgery about a year ago--no, over a year ago and he's like a new man now. His spirit is back, his eyes have their fun, little boy light in them again (which, by the way, he passed on to my husband, that little boy light is a light I love about my husband) Dick has put weight back on, and returning is his humor and handsomeness! It is truly wonderful to witness.

This is the stuff that real, true, Thankfulness comes from. This is the stuff that gratitude is made from. It comes from love of others and the ability to get out of one's self long enough to help others in their time of need and do it without thinking or without any bitterness or expecting anything in return. It is complete selflessness. Wow. It has been a long time since I helped someone especially a family member and I felt fantastic. I continue helping. I will continue helping. And in the process enjoy the privilege of spending time with my father and step-mother more regularly and I love it.

And I will never, ever take my husband's help for granted. As I see it, It is his gift to me. I hope I can return the favor in what ever way I can some day. He suffered a cold after returning from a business trip last week, and so I was able to help him through that. But it's a head cold, how bad can it really be! Hah! But scale of helping doesn't matter I am finding. It is simply knowing that doing it without expecting something in return is key. This is true, unconditional love. The same love God has for me and you.

Funny, after writing the words unconditional love I decided to look them up. Here goes:: Unconditional--not limited by conditions, absolute. Love--a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person. So, unconditional love must be a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person that has no limits and is not bound by conditions whatever they may be. Isn't that beautiful. Wow.

I believe now that unconditional love is what life is all about. It is God's gift we give to Him and to each other. I am so thankful that people in my family love me despite my flaws. I am so thankful my husband loves me despite my mistakes and character defects.

I am just as grateful for the tenderness I witness by my family members who are around me every day.

I am profoundly grateful and thankful.

I am snapping out of it! Finally! And am profoundly happy for that too. In self-forgetting, I found myself again and helped the very people I love the most in this life.

Namaste--Robin

Outside of Austin

Could this be any more lovely of a ceiling, I ask you? Being a designer myself, I vividly recall wanting a skylight in my bathroom since I was like 7 but to have one moving over the entire length of my living room is absolutely inspired. This proves you don't need square footage to impress you just have to have a fabulous architect!

This is the home of a friend of mine Judy Ridley's friend. I still want to send these fabulous pictures to editors at several shelter magazines in the hopes that they will pick it up and use it for an article. The owners have done both the exterior and interior with living in mind and living with art in mind. And that is what I love. When one notices a work of art in a home something happens to us internally. It sends a message to our brains that this can not be duplicated because it was an inspiration from some one else. I want to search for those houses that are not decorator perfect. That are not Elle Decor homes where one wouldn't dare put their feet on the cocktail table. And I want to find out what exactly it is about a work of art that makes a home so much more inviting that just another piece of prefab from Ikea. Don't get me wrong though, I love Ikea, but, when you add something artistic a room changes and it is that change I want to capture from people.

So here we go. My husband just informally interviewed for job in Austin so you never know. Keep us in your prayers because I would LOVE living in the Hill Country.

Cheers..Robin

Same Texas Home...front entryway

This house is absolutely exquisite. It is nicely situated on a smallish lot with plenty of open space outside to garden and to sit in the wonderful Texas weather. The architect made very good use of the indoor/outdoor aspects of building a home and so it's proportions are fabulous. I have lots of pictures of this home and will be sharing a few more with you before I change over to the next house. But, I think Texas has a wonderful way of changing the atmosphere in the housing industry because of the influx of money coming into the state of Wyoming, namely, Jackson Hole. And the influx of big money coming from people in southern California. These people want their money to last them longer and in order to do that they need to move to areas of the country where their dollars can stretch further than in California-- a state near bankruptcy.

My dear friend, Judy Ridley, who lives in the wonderful Horseshoe Bay are of Texas, turned me on to this house as it is her friend's place. Judy as been instrumental in showing me homes that she knows I will love and appreciate. My next push will be to try and get some of the houses I don't use in my book to be picked up by magazines. Yahoo. That should be fun. It is what I wanted to do originally, before my health went terribly south, so I am going to work on that too. I owe it to Judy for spending so much of her time with me. I also want to film Judy's house in Horseshoe Bay. What a sensational area. Wow. I often wish that Mitch and I would have had some extra money so that we could have purchased the unit next door to Judy and Mike. Now, that would have been a blast!! Hah.

Okay, I am going to be helping my step mother for the better portion of this week, so if I am hit or miss this week, bear with me please. I will do my best at keeping you all informed on houses and on my loved ones as they move through the healing process.

Have a wonderful day and let me know what you think of the houses. I love hearing from you! Happy Thanksgiving.

Robin

TheRockin R

Book Started!

Voluntary Simplicity

I am actually beginning the book that has been inside my head for years now. What I like about the idea for my book is that it has never been done before and so it will be new to the market. People will hopefully react in a positive manner to the ideas and concepts and homes that I have selected to exemplify my ideas. If you haven't noticed, things are a changing in the home furnishings industry and in the housing market. There are major reasons why these changes are occurring and I am not going into the economic reasons in my book, only what I see as examples of where housing and furnishings should be going and then highlighting the people who are forward enough to already have houses that exemplify these notions of mine. My believe it that we are headed in a brand new direction and leading the charge is a new demographic group.

I will give out one more teaser too. Trend merchandising is over, in general. I began noticing the decline in this type of marketing a number of years ago when all of a sudden the home industry was cluttered with trend people who had absolutely no idea what a trend curve was, what trend merchandising was or how to manifest it properly, or the difference between and trend and a fad. When I began to notice this, I got out of being a "trend and color"consultant. I will still use it as a valuable tool, but I will NOT highlight myself as trend person because there are simply too many people out there calling themselves that who have no idea what they're doing. When this happens the notion of trend marketing is ironically, post-peak. So, I have come up with a brand new idea on what this means moving forward and how I can best implement this in my new business, The RockinR Design Group. So, be looking for some really good mojo to come your way from me and I would love for you to follow on my Facebook page to see the pictures of the homes I will be highlighting. Or, perhaps I can figure out how to do that here. Hang on....Very cool, it just loaded up top. Now you will know why that image is there as it is part of the beginning of letting you see what I am up to now.

I can't wait to hear what you think of the houses I select and be watching for my first newsletter to come out. It's called, TrendSavvy Magazine. I have had the magazine for years and done very little with it. I think I have two issues, so let me know if you'd like me to send you a pdf version of them. Anyway, I decided I was not going to change the name of it because it still has some equity in it and I have a Website already in that name. I have started the newsletter and that should be available to see in a week or two. I love getting back in the saddle and I love feeling better. I am still a little slow, but I can still work really well because my intuition is stronger than ever. In the world of marketing and branding you had better have a person who has strong intuition skills and strong design skills and that's what I come to the table with. Yay. So, here it comes. Hope you like it!! Let me know your thoughts!

Robin

Winter Wonderful Land...well maybe!

First Snow of the Season

We are experiencing the first snow of the season. Last night when I got up around 3am for my normal run to the bathroom I noticed snow mixed with rain. Yuck. Then, when the coffee maker went off at 6am, I looked out the same bathroom window and noticed the same icy mixture of rain and snow. Now, this is actually quite wonderful. I can feel a good storm coming for days. Meaning, with my arthritic body I am like a walking barometer, really. My body can feel the change in weather. My hands ache more, my hips crack and are super sore, my back and L5 impingement is irritating more than usual. It is amazing. And it all begins about two to three days prior to the storm actually getting to town. It's like the bad outlaws that would come into town in the old days. Everyone knew they were coming and so suddenly the energy in the town shifted to negative and scared. Hah!

I was talking with my Dad yesterday and he has the same experience with this arthritis riddled body. So we giggle about how our bodies tell us about storms. Snow storms, rain storms, tornado activity, you name it. When the barometer drops our bodies feel it big time. It is simply amazing. Then, when the storm passes our bodies go back to normal. I should do some at home research on the internet and find out why that happens. If anyone reading this knows the answer, please weigh in, as I would love to know.

I am picking Mitch (the wonderful husband) up from the airport this morning. Let's all pray the runways are open and the snow doesn't really pick up until later this afternoon. They're calling for 6-10 inches today. Riiiiigggghhhhhttttt. We'll see. Mitch and I were saying last night that it would be great having a job where you are right only 50% of the time. Think about that.....Anyway, I digress, I am picking him up this morning and he's coming in from Baltimore. I have had THE best crab cakes in Baltimore! I have spent a lot of time there when I had a client who did a bunch of work there so then I did a bunch of work there and it was a lot of fun. It is a great area of the country, but then again, I am very partial to the East coast. Well, I just shouldn't have said anything at all about the weather. I just looked out my patio windows and the snow is accumulating on the deck floor. Shoot. Oh, dear, I hope the airport stays open and he has no travel nightmares. Big wet flakes of snow people. It's gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous no question, I just want my husband to come in this morning so let's all pray that happens. I wouldn't be so concerned except he was gone at the beginning of the week and he's gone again next week to Dallas so I would really like to see him this weekend. Jeez. At least it's only one of us traveling all the time. Someone has to hold down the fort!

I believe I was mentioning this travel deal on one of my last blogs. When the two of us were super busy and traveling all the time it was like no one was tending to our marital garden. I have a girl friend that likens a marriage to a garden and gardens need attention if they are to flourish, thrive, and be beautiful. Well, I can assure you, Mitch and I were not tending to our marital garden and we suffered some consequences as a result of that. I am not going to go into a bunch of detail, but suffice to say, we will not be living our lives like that ever again. One of us has to be willing to stay at home more and serve as the foundation for the marriage. We have found that that person is me due to my physical limitations (my girlfriend calls me handicapped, which I hate hearing). But with my limitations I can't get on planes all the time and travel the way I once did. I was Platinum when my husband was Gold. Now he's Platinum and I am a stay at home dog mother. Hah! We sure like it this way. I have been able to help my body get better and we have been able to communicate more making our garden look beautiful again. How great is that??

These are the little things that I have learned as I have gone through some extremely tough times. I am so glad I have learned and grown from all these lessons. I don't want to do them again I can tell you that, but it is wonderful that we are thriving again as a couple and as a mutual partnership. Mitch and I discovered that we are true partners in every way and that is very powerful information to have in a marriage. We didn't know this before I got physically ill and had to stop everything. But now we do and it's great. It's been worth everything learning that one thing.

Okay, I just looked out the doors to the deck again and it's still coming down in big wet moist flakes. Well, maybe they're not as big, which is good. I am going to wear my Ice Bugs today for sure. If you don't know what Ice Bugs are you absolutely have to Google them and get a pair if you live where there's snow and ice and you don't want to fall. These boots have saved me countless times and I have NEVER fallen while wearing them, ever. It's amazing. The pair I have go up to my ankles and have the side zipper just in case you see them while you're scrolling the pages. They rock and I get a new pair about every two years. But that will depend how much you walk outside. Since I love walking outdoors during the winter and know I can do it safely, I am over joyed. Again, these boots are a savior to me and if you have a fear of falling on snow or ice, get a pair of these please. Just Google, Ice Bugs, and you should have no problems finding them. If you do, let me know and I will help you.

Winter is here!! I hope Mitch will be too, we're going to the Louisiana Cafe for breakfast and their crab cake benedict is out of this world good! Yummy!!

Have a lovely day everyone. I am working on my new company name and logo right now, so be ready to see some exciting stuff coming from me soon. I am so happy to be back upright and functioning at my new normal. I am not handicapped, I just have a new normal. Now, that I like. Good Orderly Direction!! (GOD).

Cheers,

The RockinR

Ah, What A Wonderful Week!

Interesting Family Situations

Mitch has been gone the better part of this week and will be gone again next week to Dallas. This week it has been Michigan, Chicago, and Philadelphia. When this happens I get major dog duties. The good news? Gentle leaders!! They are the absolute best for handling dogs and making sure they don't go all over. Our dogs are about 95 pounds each and so 200 pounds of dog out weighs me by a bunch. With my hips the way they are and my spine the way it is, I must be extremely careful about what I do. However, I have been working so hard at getting stronger that my body is responding very well and the dogs are not pulling or rushing other dogs etc and so everyone is happy and well adjusted. Wow. Now isn't that just fantastic!! It is also nice having people who I can call for dog duties if I simply can't walk one day, but it is also nice knowing that I am capable and strong.

So, it's going to be trips to the Mayo in my future! But I am more than happy to help and be of service to my parents. We will be having a family discussion on Sunday and that will be a very good thing. My step-mother is taking her diagnosis and her surgery schedule and appointments to prepare in such an exceptional manner that I don't know how she does it! I am watching so that I can act the way she does. No drama, just get the thing out of me! Ha. What a great way to proceed. I will keep you posted on the outcomes and what we will be doing as a family. I think we are a very good family and we come to each other in service and help and that is such a good thing. I am wanting to make sure that my father is able to assist his wife without having to worry about anything else...so the everything else is going to be my department, I hope anyway.

Okay. more later...enjoy this beautiful day God has given us.

TheRockinR

xxxooo

Mayo Moving

Being of Service

Hello All,

Well, my husband is going back out of town until Saturday and so I will admit to some sadness over not seeing him for another three days. He was already gone over night on Monday and returned late Tuesday night. Next week he's in Dallas for three-no-four days and that always bums me out. I miss him when he's gone this much. I know he's got lots of irons in the fire, but it is difficult not having him around. I miss his energy and he's a lot of fun to watch football with. Or at least he says that about me. Hah!

Anyway, this does afford me the opportunity to be of service to my family and help them make their many pilgrimages down to the Mayo Clinic for testing etc. It makes me feel like I am helping and being of loving service and I like that a lot. And, it is something that removes the feelings of missing my husband as he travels. It is also funny how things change. There was once a time when my husband and I were actually meeting in the airport for breakfast or lunch or dinner because we were both so "busy" traveling to see clients. We were so busy in fact that we unconsciously decided our clients were more important to see than each other. Not a good scenario. So, we have definitely changed how we do business in that regard and that's why I miss him now when he leaves. I am the one left at home, which is always a little trying. But the good news is that it provides me the time to hang with my family...the very family I thought I didn't have much time for when I was so "busy" seeing clients. I will never do that again..even as I ramp up my new business, which is coming very soon people!! I will never forsake my family or my friends for work.

So, I will keep you posted as to the Mayo because my parents know it like the back of their hands! How cool is that!! What a great opportunity and I look forward to hanging out with both of them.

More to come.....pray.....Thank you God for this day!

The RockinR!

Musings Musings Musings!

Musing in the Woods

Yesterday I was actually able to go on another walk in the woods with my dogs. What an amazing change of events. My husband is shocked, absolutely shocked at the change taking place in my body as I work on my emotions and my spiritual life. My friends are amazed because suddenly my creativity and intuition is returning regarding the naming and intuitive thinking about my next company and what it will be and what it will consist of in terms of the nature of the business. I think I know, but it is still coming out of me intuitively, so I have learned to wait on that intuition--because I think intuition comes from God so I wait on Him to help me with everything. So, all of these great events are returning to me in such a way that I am thrilled and happy at the same time. I have not had these feelings occur together at the same time for a long, long time. Remember, a few short months ago I couldn't get out of bed I was so depressed. Then I eventually moved to the sofa and stayed there for more months until I finally said to myself :: "Self! Enough is enough. Do you really think that this is the way God wants you to live out your life? I don't think so sister, so get up and get going." I can't tell you exactly what that day was, but I haven't been the same since.

I am so excited because I emailed my terrific graphic artist and she agreed to meet me for lunch next week. Then I talked with my dear, dear best friends in Texas the Ridley's and they are doing great. I ran the name of my company by them and they loved it. I am not going to announce it here until it is a reality, but suffice to say, I am only asking the friends to whom I believe their insight and experience is so important. My husband actually blurted it out before I said it so we're on the same page. Holy cow! How about that? He's on a business trip and at O'Hare and he blurts out the same idea I had for my new company name. I love it!! He's a GOD!! Ha. He loves it when I say that. Okay, so, I am going to get really healed up and working on my body/mind connection so that I can take a trip with my husband to Texas the state my soul needs. I love that state and I haven't been there for so long that my heart aches. I can't wait to go back and I hope it will be soon. Mitch goes to Dallas next week and boy would I ever love going with him. We shall see....I doubt it though. Too many things going on here at the moment. Anyway, by taking these actions I feel like I am getting back in the game and that feels so very, very good. At one time I actually had an appointment with the governor of Texas' wife. I need to see if I can rekindle that opportunity. Another thing we will see about.

The other thing I do know is that my company will not be about trend/color any longer. These two ideas for business are completely post-peak. If you don't know what I mean by that write me and I will explain it. But these days, everyone calls themselves trend/color people and when that starts to happen you have a strategy that is post-peak or OVER!!

The real deal is that most people are not trend/color people because doing it requires enormous amounts of observation, intuition and love of detail. These three things do not come naturally to most people, they want it to be true, but it is not. That's why the true trendologist's are rare and extremely talented. (Like me) If you really want your sales to increase, products and packaging to rock, you need a person who totally understands the retail trend curve and the power of a well designed brand...but....please don't get me going or I will seriously be on my soap box. NO SOAP BOX FOR ME!! Hah.

The happiness that I am now feeling is wonderful and so long in coming since I have been jammed up for so long. Getting myself un-jammed is the work I am doing now. As I do it my intuition is coming back and that is truly a miracle. I am so blessed I just can't believe it. I am saying no more about it in case it is all a mistake and not true. Which is just the kid in me thinking that the sky is falling. Hah! The truth is, I am getting better and I am working on getting better and that feels fantastic.

Thank you God!!!!

Have a wonderful November day no matter where you are in this world.

RockinR

WONDERFUL EMOTIONAL WORK!!

The Joys of Finding the New Me!

Yesterday I had two major appointments. One was with Julia my therapist. One was with my Alanon sponsor. Both were absolutely profound. I seem to be having a string of profound and altering emotional moments these days and they are so wanted and needed and perfectly timed. God's timing is always perfect that is for sure.

Anyway, my therapy meeting was all about how marriage is a balance of being vulnerable and being confident for me. As a matter of fact, most important close relationships require these two things for true intimacy with another human being. She put two circles on a piece of paper and made sure that the two intersected and it is within that intersection that I need to learn how to live. I look at that paper a million times a day because I truly want to understand it and implement it in my daily life with my loving husband and with my loving family and friends. It is so important for me to have healthy people surround me and people who only love and support me as I love and support them. It is making my body completely different. My husband, Mitch, is completely astonished at how my body is now compared to two weeks ago when I began my work with Julia and with Maureen from Wings of Freedom. I am literally not the same person. My healer, Dr. Wilkens, also changed my medications and I feel completely different and much, much better inside and outside of my body.

My meeting with my Alanon sponsor was profound in a way that only 12 Step Programs can be. She is everything I want to be and I am so grateful she is in my life. I have known her a long time and she knows me very well. I have no fear when I bring my 5th step to her because she is nothing but loving and supportive of me and the struggles I have with my character defects. This time her message to me came right out of her mouth and right into my belly and heart. Since Maureen says there are holes in my heart, my sponsor Lynda was able to see how some of them can be healed, just like Julia could see that. So, now, I have these two wonderfully powerful, intuitive women, helping me see what I could not about myself and now the work begins for me to see if I can heal some of those holes in my heart. My heart has been shattered and broken, so putting it back together is exciting and humbling simultaneously. It makes me feel like I am moving from being broken to being healed and that is extremely powerful for me. Thank you God. God is the most important healer and so bringing all of this to Him is so wonderful for me. It makes me profoundly humbled, honored, and more in love with Him, which means my relationship with God is getting stronger each day. How wonderful is that?

I will keep you all posted on the progress of this work, but I need to process some of this information before I take any action on it. I know what the actions are that I need to move forward on, but I want to settle into them and not react. I want to calmly take direction and move forward. What a concept.

More later....

Great Hiking Today!! And What a Gorgeous Day For It.

Walking In The Woods with the Husband + The Doggies

Today I did what I have not been able to do for what seems to be months, many months, which is to go walking in the woods. This act is a complete joy of my heart. I think it must stem from the fact that my father was a forester for the Federal Government's Fish and Wildlife Department and we were all brought up walking in the woods where we would be given instruction on what the names of trees were, mushrooms, (Dad always said it takes two to research mushrooms. One to eat the mushroom and one to take notes, teehee). fern names, all sorts of wonderful times were had while walking in the woods as children with him. I love him for his love of doing this with us.

Today it was the same way. We all packed into the car and drove up to Pine Point Park in Stillwater. It is a lovely park which is the beginning of the Gate Way Trail, but this part of the park is rarely used by walkers or hikers, but is used by horseback riders, which is fun. Anyway, I was able to feel, smell, and hear the crunch of the dry leaves under my feet and got to watch my dogs running all over the woods and jumping over downed trees! I also had such a nice bonding session with my husband. We walk and talk. Or more accurately, he walks and I talk! I usually see an owl or two while I am in this particular section of the woods, but today, no such luck. Maybe Tuesday. I plan on going again on Tuesday after my doctor's appointment with Jane Wilkens. I will keep you posted on all owl sightings.

I truly believe that I was able to hike today because of the energy clearing that I did last Saturday and because of the new medications that I am taking which are not as hard on me, and the fact that I am doing my PT and getting stronger all the time. I did wear my corset while I walked and it was a good thing to do. I also knew my time limitations and the distance I could walk. I did not want to over do and then feel terrible tomorrow. So, things are good and I am very happy about it. Now, it's off to make an anti-inflammatory recipe dinner for us and curl up on the sofa and watch a movie with my family.

It doesn't get much better than this. And I used to think life had to be so much bigger and badder and busier. Boy was I ever wrong!! Life is sweet when it is slowed down and the focus is on family, our animal family, and our friends. I am learning so much!!

Go take a walk if you want your endorphins to kick in too. Boy is that every fantastic. Who needs to take anti-anythings when you have a body that wants to make you feel good all by itself!! I am absolutely convinced that the body/mind connection is essential for optimal health. I am more than ever before determined to seek out and understand this connection and do the best I can every day to help my body help itself. Knowing God is crazy about me (and you too by the way) makes me feel really, really good inside.

Have a lovely evening. Smell the dry leaves when you are outside next. It is intoxicating!

Namaste----Robin